


The Unexamined Life

by NavajoLovesDestiel



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Bottom Castiel, Bottom Dean, Coffee Shops, Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff, Gabriel is Bisexual, Light Angst, M/M, Past Rape/Non-con, Smut, Switching, Tattoos, Top Castiel, Top Dean Winchester
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-05
Updated: 2018-11-05
Packaged: 2019-08-19 07:34:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 19,868
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16530224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NavajoLovesDestiel/pseuds/NavajoLovesDestiel
Summary: His voice did things to Cas, dirty, sexy things.Cas smiled again. “Hey. What can I get you?”The guy’s amazing apple-green eyes looked Cas down and back up as his tongue peeked out of his full lips.“Uh. just a large, regular black coffee please.”Cas nodded and reached for the cash register.“And do you have any pie?”





	1. Chapter 1

Cas stood outside the coffee shop, taking a much needed break. He heard the sound before he saw it, and watched it approach. It was a beautiful machine, sleek and black with silver flames painted on the gas tank. He watched the owner get off, swinging his muscled leg over with ease. He undid the strap holding he helmet and pulled it off.

Cas had to take a deep breath. The rider was magnificent, so handsome it made Cas’ stomach hurt just to look at him. He was a couple of inches taller than Cas, had reddish-blond-brown hair that defied a name. His freckles were spattered over his face and went down his neck into his Zeppelin T shirt. Cas’ eyes wandered down and fuck! The guy had bow legs that made Cas suddenly picture them wrapped around his waist.

The guy walked towards the door of the coffee shop, and just as he reached for the door, He turned and smiled at Cas. The smile was dazzling.

Cas smiled back and followed the man into the shop. He slipped behind the counter just as the guy walked up.

“Hey!”

His voice did things to Cas, dirty, sexy things.

Cas smiled again. “Hey. What can I get you?”

The guy’s amazing apple-green eyes looked Cas down and back up as his tongue peeked out of his full lips.

“Uh. just a large, regular black coffee please.”

Cas nodded and reached for the cash register.

“And do you have any pie?”

Cas’ eyes went back to meet the green.

“Um yeah, we’ve got apple and blueberry.”

There was that smile again.

“Great! I’ll have a slice of apple.”

Cas rang it up, and when the guy handed him the money, he noticed the tattoos peeking out from beneath the long sleeves. They were beautiful.

Cas told the guy to sit, and he’d bring the coffee and the pie to his table. He watched him walk away, his eyes glued to the guy’s ass. It looked tasty in the tight black jeans.

Cas got the pie, cutting a generous slice, and the coffee and walked to where the guy was sitting. He put them down and the guy looked up at him and smiled again.

“Will there be anything else?”

“Nah, I’m good for the moment. Thanks.”

Cas nodded and went back behind the counter.

He made a point of not staring, just glancing every few minutes. When the guy finished his pie, he tipped up the cup. Cas grabbed the coffee pot and walked over.

“Would you like a fill up?”

Again the guy smiled and nodded. Cas filled his cup.

“Thanks. Say, can I ask you something?”

Cas smiled. “Sure.”

“Uh, do you work here every day?”

Cas wondered where this was going, but he said, “Yeah, I do. Monday through Friday, anyway.”

“I’m Dean.”

Cas felt his face heating up. “Uh, Cas. My name is Cas.”

“Happy to meet you! I’m new in town, don’t know a soul. But now I know you.”

Cas grinned. “Yeah, you do. Nice to meet you too, Dean.”

Cas glanced around the shop, making sure it was still empty. The morning rush had ended an hour ago.

He put the pot on the table. “Mind if I sit down?”

Dean smiled that brighter-than-the-sun smile. “I’d like that.”

Cas sat.

“So, you’re new in town? Where are you from?”

Dean sipped his coffee. “Lebanon. Just moved to Lawrence a week ago.”

Cas nodded. “What brought you here? I mean, it’s not exactly the garden spot of Kansas, if there even is one in this state.”

Dean chuckled. “Work. I start at Singer’s Auto next week.”

Cas grinned. “Not surprised to hear you’re a mechanic. I saw your bike when you rode up. It’s a real beauty.”

Dean beamed at him. “Yeah, I know. You like bikes, Cas?”

“Who doesn’t? I’d love to have one.”

“What do you drive?” Dean looked at him intently.

Cas felt his face get red. “Shit I’m ashamed to tell you.”

Dean laughed. “Please don’t say a Prius.”

That made Cas chuckle. “Nope, not a Prius. It’s a seventy-six Continental.”

Thae made Dean laugh harder. “So, you’re a pimp in your spare time?”

They laughed easily.

Then, the bell attached to the door gave a jingle, and Balthazar walked in. Cas grabbed the pot and walked to the counter.

“Hello, Cas. How are you today?”

Cas smiled. “I’m good, you?”

Balthazar smiled. “If you’d go out with me, my day would get better.”

Cas frowned. “The answer is still no, Balth.”

Balthazar sighed dramatically. “In that case, I’ll have the usual, my dear boy.”

Dean was watching the exchange. When Cas looked at him, he mouthed, ‘Are you okay?”

Cas nodded and got Balthazar his mocha vente. On his way out the door, Balthazar said over his shoulder, “If you change your mind, Cassie, you know where to find me.”

When he was gone, Dean got up and walked to the counter.

“Well, he was a smarmy bastard.”

Cas chuckled. “He’s not so bad, just doesn’t like taking no for an answer.”

Dean smiled. “Well, gotta get going. I’ll see you tomorrow, Cas.”

“Yeah, see you.” Cas watched Dean walk away, and he stared at his ass again.

Turning back to his work, he wondered if Dean was gay. Where there’s life, there’s hope, that’s what his mom always said.

When Meg came in to relieve him, she immediately looked at him with a smirk.

“Something happened. Spill, Clarence.”

Cas frowned. “Nothing happened, what makes you say that?”

Meg grinned. “You were smiling when I came in. You never smile, well, not at work anyway. Tell me.”

Cas grinned. “Oh nothing much, just the most handsome man in the world came in today.”

Meg grabbed him by the arm and led him to a table.

“Tell me everything.”

Cas looked thoughtful. “He rides a hog, he has ink, he’s so beautiful he blots out the sun. and he’s new in town.”

Meg squealed. “Oh Clarence! Is he gay?”

Cas laughed. “How the hell would I know? We only talked for a few minutes.”

Meg hit him on the arm. “Gaydar, Cas! Use your gaydar.”

Cas rubbed his arm. “Not everyone has that, you know. And fuck, that hurt!”

Meg grinned and got up. “Don’t be a pussy, Clarence.”

Cas grinned and went out the door, headed for his car.

 


	2. Chapter 2

Cas parked in the driveway, got out and walked in the house. 

“Gabe? Alfie? I’m home…” 

Alfie walked out of the kitchen, half-eaten apple in his hand.

“Cas? Hey, how was your day?”

Cas grinned. “It was pretty damn good, actually. Gabe home?”

Alfie shook his head. “Nope, He went out about an hour ago.”

Cas nodded and walked to his room. Once inside, he stripped and grabbed a towel. He walked to the bathroom and turned on the shower.

While he waited for the water to get hot, he leaned against the counter, thinking about Dean. Dean was probably just friendly, trying to get to know people. But Cas could hope. He really wanted to see Dean’s ink, up close and personal. 

He sighed and got in.

Dried off and towling his wet hair, he walked out of the bathroom naked and ran straight into Kali, Gabe’s sometime girlfriend.

“Jesus, Cas! Put some clothes on!”

Cas grumbled that it was his house too, and went to the top of the stairs. 

“Alfie!” he yelled down the stairs, “I thought you said Gabe wasn’t home!”

Alfie stood at the bottom. “He’s not. Oh, Kali is here.”

Cas shook his head. “You could have told me before.”

Alfie just walked away.

Cas went to his bedroom and pulled on sweats and a T shirt. He sat on the bed, still mad at Alfie, and at Gabe for that matter. He was the one who left Kali here.

He grabbed his stash box and rolled himself a J, then laid on the bed and smoked it. 

His mind drifted. He thought about maybe taking his car to Dean to get some work done. That led him to think about Dean, which was pleasant, but that led him to think about work and his boss. Definitely not a pleasant thought.

Crowley was mean, stingy and just basically unpleasant to be around. He dropped in every few weeks, just to give Cas a hard time. 

Cas didn’t want to think about Crowley so he started thinking about food, which led him to get up and go find some. He carried some snacks back to his room, got out his laptop and fired up some porn.

 

He was cleaning up after the breakfast rush when the bell on the door tinkled. He looked up at Dean walking up to the counter. He looked even more delectable today than yesterday. He was wearing a black leather jacket that fit him like a second skin.

“Hey Cas.”

Cas smiled. “Hi, Dean. What can I get you?”

Dean grinned back. “Same as yesterday, I guess. You got some time to sit with me?”

Cas walked to the pie display. “Sure. Sit, I’ll be there in a minute.”

Dean sat at the same table as yesterday. He shucked off his jacket and put it on the back of his chair.

Cas brought the pie and coffee, adding a cup for himself. He put everything down and sat across from Dean.

Dean took a big bite of pie and made a sort of moan that went straight to Cas’ dick. Cas sipped his coffee and tried to remain calm.

“Do you bake the pies?”

Cas nodded. “Nah. Meg does them.”

Dean cocked his head. “Meg?”

“She works here in the evenings. She’s like my best friend I guess.”

Dean drank some of his coffee. “I guess I’ll have to come for dinner some time and meet her.”

Cas felt a twinge, but shrugged it off. He couldn’t be jealous of Meg, she was gay too.

“Sure. She’s kind of an acquired taste, just warning you.”

Dean chuckled. “Okay, got it. You know, unless you’re completely sick of this place, maybe we could have dinner here?”

Cas blinked. “Uh… sure! I’d like that.”

“Tonight?” Dean took another bite of his pie.

“Sure, tonight is great.” Cas tried to keep his voice even. It was just one guy asking his guy friend to eat with him. Nothing more.

“Cool. Tell me where you live, and I’ll pick you up. Give you a chance to ride my baby.”

Cas nodded. He grabbed a napkin and wrote his address down.

“Seven? That okay?”

Cas was already trying to decide what to wear. “Seven works for me.”

Cas suddenly had a picture of Dean meeting Gabe and Alfie and it wasn’t pretty.

“Uh, I’ll meet you outside. I… wouldn’t want to subject you to my brothers.”

Dean looked amused. “You live with your brothers?”

Cas took a swallow of his coffee, then nodded. “Two of them, one older and one younger.”

“Two of them? How many brothers do you have?”

Cas sighed. “Including me, there are five of us. But I only get along with the two I live with. And to be honest, I barely tolerate them.”

Dean chuckled. “Okay. I’ve got a younger brother, but we’re tight.”   
“Must be nice,” Cas said under his breath.

Dean was finished, and he pulled some money out of his pocket and dropped it on the table.

“Gotta go. I’ll pick you up at seven. Thanks for coming with me, Cas.”

Cas stood up. “Thanks for asking me, Dean.” He gathered up the plate and the cups and walked back behind the counter as Dean left.

When Meg came in, she walked up to Cas and grinned,

“So did he show, Clarence?”

“Well, hello to you too, Meg. And yeah, he did.”

Meg chewed her lip. “I need to get a look at this mystery man.”

Cas smiled. “Well you’re going to get your chance. He asked me to eat with him tonight. Here. He wants to meet you.”

Meg squealed at a pitch that Cas was sure only dogs should be able to hear.

“Clarence! He asked you on a date? That’s amazing!”

Cas grimaced. “Jesus, Meg, get a grip. I never said it was a date. He just wants to meet my bestie.”

Meg grabbed her apron, singsonging, “Cas had a date, Cas has a date.”

“Stow it, Manners. You know I don’t date. And for fuck’s sake, behave yourself tonight!”

Meg made a cross-my-heart with her fingers.

Cas shook his head and got ready to go home.

When he arrived, he went straight to take a shower. He needed to get the coffee smell off him, and he needed the time to think. He needed to not get his hopes up. Dean didn’t give off any gay vibes at all. He was just being friendly and Cas needed to remember that. Just friends. 

He was trying to decide what to wear when Gabe knocked on the door and then came in. He stood back and looked at the pile of clothes that lay on the bed.

“Hot date tonight, Cassie?”

Cas frowned as he pulled out his favorite blue henley.

“Not a date. Going out with a friend.”

Gabe sat on the bed. “This many changes of clothes for a friend? Come on, who is it?”

Cas turned and looked at him. “You don’t know him.”

Gabe chuckled. “And let me guess, you don’t want me to.”

Cas pulled the henley on and nodded. “That’s right. He’s… normal. And you’re not.”

Gabe made a face. “Hey, words hurt, little bro. At any rate, have a good time. I’m spending the night with Balthazar, just letting you know.”

Cas frowned. “”Balth? I thought you two broke up.”

Gabe giggled. “We did, but you know I’m irresistible. He wants me back.”

Cas shook his head. “I knew he was crazy. Tell him to stop hitting on me, if he’s sleeping with you.”

Gabe slapped his hands on his thighs. “I don’t control him. Welp, gonna let you get to it. And I almost forgot, Alfie’s spending the night at a friend’s house. You’ll have the place all to yourself.” He waggled his eyebrows up and down suggestively and left.

Cas picked out a pair of jeans and pulled them on.

 


	3. Chapter 3

Cas was outside, standing at the curb when he heard the sound of a motorcycle. He grinned as Dean pulled up. Dean got off and pulled his helmet off.

“Hey, Cas! Ready to go?”

Cas grinned. “Hey yourself and hell yeah.”

Dean opened up a saddle bag and got out another helmet. He walked to Cas and put it on his head, then did the strap under Cas’ chin.

“Gotta protect that pretty head.”

Cas’ heart skipped a beat. Dean thought he was pretty? Was he flirting? He took a deep breath.

Dean climbed back on and patted the seat behind him. Cas swung his leg over and got on behind him. He was pressed up against Dean’s ass, and his cock threatened to get hard.

‘Down boy’ he thought in the direction of his crotch. He grabbed Dean’s waist and the cycle roared to life. 

“Hang on!” Dean yelled and they roared off.

Cas loved it. He’d been on a motorcycle before and he always thought it  felt like flying. He tightened his grip on Dean’s hips and just let the wind fly by.

It was way too soon when they arrived at the coffee shop, in Cas’ opinion. But Dean stopped, let down the kickstand and got off. Cas got off after him and they both took off their helmets. Cas tried to smooth down his hair, but it probably was useless. He walked to the door and Dean opened it for him.

They walked in and Meg looked up from behind the counter. She broke out in a huge grin. Dean led him to a booth and they sat down. Meg walked up, still grinning.

“Hey. Clarence, who’s this?”

Dean looked confused.

“Don’t mind her, she always calls me that. Meg, this is Dean. Dean, Meg.”

Dean smiled. “Nice to meet you.”

Meg chuckled. “Hi, Dean. You’re even better looking than Clarence told me you were.”

Cas blushed and Dean laughed.

Meg took their orders, and gave them to the short order cook who worked the dinner hours. She brought them both a cup of coffee and when she walked away, she turned and gave Cas a thumbs up.

Dean took a sip of coffee and looked at Cas.

“Well, she’s certainly something!”

Cas chuckled. “Yeah, we’re still trying to figure out what, though.”

Dean laughed. “So, you think I’m handsome?”

Cas grinned. “Fishing for compliments? Yeah, I think you’re handsome.”

Dean smiled. “Well, it’s always nice to hear that someone as pretty as you thinks I look okay.”

Cas bit his lip. “That’s the second time you’ve called me pretty.”

Dean frowned. “It is? Well, sorry, I was wrong.”

Cas tilted his head and raised one eyebrow.

Dean laughed. “Yeah, I should have said ‘beautiful’. Because you are probably the most beautiful man I’ve ever laid eyes on.”

Cas blushed beet red. He looked away, trying to get control. 

“Stop that. You don’t even know me.”

Dean’s smile faded. “I know, but I’d like to get to.”

Cas felt like this man was going to sweep him right off his feet.

Meg arrived with their burgers and fries, and they began to eat. Cas was thankful for the breather.

After eating some of his burger, Cas looked at Dean. “Can I ask you a question?”

Dean put down his burger, “Shoot.”

Cas took a deep breath. “Are you gay?”

Dean stared at him for a moment and then started to laugh.

When he caught his breath, he wheezed out, “Man, I’m really going to have to work on my game if you have to ask. But to answer your question, I’m bi. But I lean way more towards men.”

Cas nodded. “I’m gay. I just needed to reassure myself you weren’t just being really nice. I tend to misunderstand flirting.”

Meg had been watching Dean’s belly laugh, and she grabbed the coffee pot and walked to their table.

“Well you two sure seem to be having fun. Care to share with the class? Refill?”

Cas shook his head. “Nope, Meg, just gonna leave you wondering.”

She frowned and poured more coffee in their cups.

They finished their food and  Dean paid. Cas said goodbye to Meg and they walked back to Dean’s bike. Dean stood next to it and turned to Cas.

“So, what now?”

Cas looked at the sidewalk, suddenly feeling shy, but he took a deep breath and looked at Dean.

“Can we just ride? Nowhere in particular, just… I love riding with you.”

Dean grinned and nodded. “Of course we can.” He grabbed Cas’ helmet and put it on Cas’ head, and again, did up the strap. Then he put on his own helmet and got on the motorcycle. Cas got on behind him and Dean kickstarted it and roared away.

Cas wrapped his arms around Dean’s waist and leaned against him. Dean felt strong and sturdy against him. 

Dean drove a ways out of town, then pulled over and stopped. He turned his head and said, “Take off your helmet.”

Cas did, wondering what was up. Dean took his off as well.

“Look up, Cas.”

Cas looked up at the starry sky. It was beautiful here, so far from the lights of town. Cas felt like he could see the entire milky way. He took a deep breath.

“It’s beautiful.”

Dean nodded. “Yeah, it is. I love to come out here and just look at the stars.”

They sat on the motorcycle and looked up for a time, Cas had no idea how long. But finally, Dean sighed. 

“Probably time to take you home.”

Cas didn’t answer, but he put his helmet back on. Dean did too, fired up the bike and drove back into town and to Cas’ house.

Dean parked the bike and got off, and Cas got off too. They stood for a moment, then Cas took off his helmet and handed it to Dean, who threw it on the seat. He leaned over and brushed his lips over Cas’, it was just the hint of a kiss. His warm breath ghosted over Cas’ lips.

“See you in the morning, Cas.”

Cas nodded, then turned and walked to the front door. He turned around, and Dean was leaning on the bike. Cas gave a little wave, and Dean waved back. Then Cas opened the door and went inside.

Alfie was on the couch, playing a video game. He looked up at Cas and grinned.

“Have a good time?”

Cas nodded. “A very good time.” He walked upstairs and went to bed.

Sleep didn’t come easy.

 


	4. Chapter 4

When Dean came in the next morning, Cas was serving some college kids. Dean waited at the counter. When Cas walked up, his face broke into a grin and Cas smiled back.   
“Hello Dean.”

“Hey, Cas. How you doing today?’

Cas poured Dean a cup of coffee. “I’m doing great. I had a good time last night.”

Dean said quietly, “I did too. Can we do it again?”

Cas walked to the pie case and grabbed the apple pie. “I’d like that.”

Dean took the coffee and pie and walked to his usual booth. He sat down and eyed Cas, motioning with his head for Cas to sit. Cas looked at the kids, who were lost in conversation, and sat down.

Dean took a bite of pie and rolled his eyes appreciatively. 

“So, I was thinking, maybe you could come to my place tonight, let me cook you dinner.”

“You cook?” For some reason, Cas was really surprised by that.

“I get by. So, can you?”

Cas grinned. “Yeah, sounds good. What time and what should I bring?”

Dean took a sip of his coffee. “How does seven sound? And just yourself.”

Cas nodded, and grabbed a napkin and slid it over to Dean along with the pen he kept in his pocket.

“Give me your address.”

Dean wrote down his address and slid it back to Cas. When Cas reached for it, Dean covered Cas’ hand with his own. They looked at each other for a minute, a month, a year? Cas couldn’t tell. Then the kids yelled at him for more coffee. Dean moved his hand, and Cas got up to get the pot.

A man came in, and while Cas was taking his order, Dean got up to leave. He mouthed, ‘See you at seven’ and Cas nodded.

The day drug on. Cas had never been so happy to see Meg in his life.

Meg insisted on asking about Dean. 

“We had dinner, We looked at the stars. Nothing happened, okay?”

Meg smiled that cat-like smile, the one that Cas just hated.

“But you want something to happen.”

Cas frowned. “You know I don’t, Meg. Fuck off..”

Meg put a hand on Cas’ shoulder. “You can’t be celibate forever, Clarence. ”

Cas shook her hand off. “I can try.”

 

Cas sat outside Dean’s house, taking a deep breath. He was really nervous.  _ ‘What the fuck are you doing, Novak? This is a date. You don’t date. Just drive away, call him and tell him something came up.’ _

This wasn’t in a public place, this was Dean’s home. He was afraid something would happen and he was kind of afraid it wouldn’t. He really liked Dean, but he was a mess. His life was a mess. He was sure when Dean found out just what a fuck-up he was, he’d run for the hills. The last thing Cas wanted was to get hurt.

Taking a deep breath, he got out and walked to the door.

Dean’s house was tiny but really nice. Cas knocked and after a few moments, Dean answered the door.

He let Cas in with a smile, and when Cas was inside, Dean grabbed him and kissed him. It was a great kiss.

Cas melted into it, and then Dean was pulling away

“Right on time! Come into the kitchen, dinner’s almost ready.”

Cas followed Dean in a daze.

When they got there, Dean lifted the lid on a crock pot and the delicious aroma permeated the air. Then, Dean opened the refrigerator and came back with two beers. He held one out to Cas.

Cas stared at it. Then he took two steps back.

“Uh, no… thanks… I uh… don’t drink.”

Dean looked at him with curiosity written all over his face, but then he put the beers back in the fridge.

“Okay! Good to know. How about some…” He looked in the fridge again. “Coke?”

Cas swallowed and nodded. “Yeah, that would be great.”

The stew was wonderful, flavorful with just the right amount of heat. There was cornbread, too. Cas ate until he thought he would be sick. He pushed back his bowl with a satisfied sigh.

“That was incredible, Dean. Thanks.”

Dean beamed at him. He put the bowls and plates in the sink, ran some water over them and held out a hand to Cas.

“Come on, let’s go the couch.”

Cas let himself be pulled up, then followed Dean to the living room. They sat on the couch with their cans of coke.

Cas sighed and plunged right in. “Dean, I’m an alcoholic. Been on the wagon now for almost a year. Should have told you before, it just didn’t come up.”

Dean looked at him with a smile shining in his eyes. “It’s okay, Cas. No harm done. And congratulations on getting sober.”

Cas looked away, then back at Dean.

“Didn’t have much of a choice. Almost died.”

Dean’s eyes got sadder. “I’m sorry, Cas. If you don’t want to talk about it, you don’t have to.”

“It’s okay.. I started drinking when I was fifteen. Drank every day for ten years. I thought I was fine, until I got alcohol poisoning and almost died..”

Cas took a deep breath.

Dean listened quietly. He reached out and took Cas’ hand.

Cas looked up at Dean. “I’m a mess, Dean. Kind of broken. You’re great, and you certainly deserve better than a friend like me.”

Dean frowned. “Hey, I like you. You don’t get to tell me who I deserve and who I don’t. I’m a big boy, I make up my own mind. And I want to get to know you a lot better. I don’t care that you’re broken, but I’m not sure you’re as broken as you think you are.”

He leaned forward and lightly kissed Cas.

Cas leaned into it and it was over all too soon. He licked his lips, chasing the taste of Dean’s mouth.

“You may be sorry, but thanks. Everyone else thinks I’m hopeless.”

Dean smiled, and Cas looked at the crinkles around his eyes and thought briefly that they were the most beautiful eyes in the world.

“Then they’re stupid.” 

Cas smiled. “Can we kiss again?”

Dean laughed and pulled Cas closer. He kissed Cas, his tongue demanding entry into Cas’ mouth and Cas opening for it eagerly.

Cas had no conception of how long they kissed. He never wanted it to end, but eventually they had to breathe.

Cas opened his eyes and Dean’s eyes were mostly black, just rimmed in green.

He realized they were both breathing hard, and that his cock was hard in his jeans.

He pulled away. “I… I should go home.”

Dean smiled and stood up. Cas stood and walked to the door, Dean trailing behind him. They went out on the front porch, and Dean started to laugh. Cas stared at him.

“That’s…,” Dean gasped, “That’s your car?”

Cas frowned. “Yes, it’s my car. What’s wrong with it?”

Dean tried to catch his breath. “Like I said before, nothing, if you’re a pimp.”

Cas chuckled, but tried his best to sound offended.

“There is  _ nothing _ wrong with my car.”

Dean put his hand on Cas’ shoulder. “You just keep telling yourself that, Cas.”

Cas huffed and walked to his car. The door creaked when he opened it, and he looked at Dean standing under the porch light. He was grinning.

“Good night, Dean.”

Dean waved and said good night back, and watched Cas drive away. Shaking his head, he went back inside and closed the door.

 


	5. Chapter 5

Gabe was sitting on the couch when Cas got home. He grinned at Cas.

“Hey, Cassie? Hot date?”

Cas sighed. “Date, yes. Hot. no.”

Gabe frowned in mock sympathy. “Oh, I’m so sorry. Couldn’t get laid? Again? You need to rethink your priorities, bro.”

Cas frowned in return. “Yeah, yeah, I’m a loser. Get off my back, Gabe.”

Gabe laughed. “Hey, I’m just sayin’, I could probably find someone to fuck you. Just say the word.”

Cas started up the stairs.

“You’re gross, you know that right?”

He walked to his room with Gabe’s laughter following him. He shut the door with a slam, and sat on the bed.

Cas touched his lips, remembering kissing Dean. Well, it was more Dean kissing him, but it was amazing. He was so horny. He hadn’t been with anyone since he quit drinking. Before that, he had found the majority of his sex partners in a bar. That was off the table now.

He grabbed his stash box and loaded his pipe. He took a long drag and laid back. After a few tokes, he was still horny. He thought about spanking the monkey, which led him to thinking about choking the chicken and then he was laughing. 

He stood up and took off his clothes, then found the lube he hid under the bed, or Gabe would come in his room, find it and use it all up.

He laid back down and spread his legs. He lubed up both his hands and bent his knees. He slid one lubed finger into his ass, and grabbed his cock with the other lubed hand. 

He sighed, and began to run his hand up and down his cock, and fingered himself. He graduated to three fingers quickly, then came unexpectedly with a loud groan. He got up and grabbed the shirt he’d thrown on the floor and wiped himself off, then walked naked to the bathroom to shower. He didn’t give a damn if Kali was here or not. He paid rent, he was entitled.

After he got cleaned up, he pulled on boxers and walked downstairs. Thankfully, Gabe was gone. He went to the kitchen, looking for something to snack on. He grabbed a bag of chips and went back to his room. 

He ate chips and thought about firing up his laptop, but it seemed like too much work. He tossed the bag of chips on the bedside table, turned off the light and went to sleep.

He dreamed about drinking and Dean.

When he woke up the next morning, he decided he was going to see Dean again, and just live with the consequences.

 

Dean was right on time in the morning. Cas was wiping off a table when he came in, and he walked straight to Cas and kissed him. When they broke apart, Cas smiled.

“Hey cowboy. How are you this morning?”

Dean grinned. “I’m good. How are you, sunshine?”

Cas smiled back. “I’m okay. Let me get your coffee and pie.”

Cas came back to where Dean was sitting and put the pie and coffee down. He sat down across from Dean.

“Don’t you ever get tired of pie?’

Dean got an expression of exaggerated shock on his face. 

“Shut your mouth! Blasphemy! There can never be too much pie.”

Cas laughed. “Okay, noted.”

Dean took a big bite and moaned around it. Cas’ cock gave an interested twitch.

“So, Cas, I gotta start work on Monday, so I won’t be able to come in every morning. I was wondering… can we spend Friday and Saturday together?”

Cas felt like he needed to know exactly what Dean was proposing.

“Uh, you mean like… overnight?”

Dean looked a little shy. “I was hoping, I mean, if you’re not ready, we don’t have to, you know,  _ do _ anything.”

He looked so shy and unsure of himself, Cas had to chuckle.

“Look, Dean. I’m not ready to have sex with anyone. But if all you’re asking me is to spend the night so we can spend the entire Saturday together, then I’m down for that.”

Dean nodded. “Great! What time do you get off?”

Cas quirked an eyebrow at him, and Dean blushed a little.

“Off work. Tomorrow. What time do you get off work.”

Cas had to laugh. “I  _ get off  _ at four.”

Dean blushed redder. He drank the rest of his coffee and put the cup down, trying to regain his composure.

“Okay, how about I pick you up here at four then.”.

Someone came in, and Cas stood up. “I’ll pack a bag.”

Dean stood up, threw the money down on the table and smiled. “Looking forward to it.” 

Cas winked at him and went to take care of the customer.

When he got home from work, Alfie was doing homework at the table.

“Alf, I’ll be gone all weekend. Will you tell Gabe when and if you see him?”

Alfie looked up and grinned. “New beau?”

Cas smiled. “Yeah, you could say that.”

Alfie went back to his homework, but said, “It’s about time.”

Cas looked for something to cook for dinner and never said a word.

When they were done eating, Cas stood up and ruffled Alfie’s hair.

“Do the dishes, and be good this weekend. And no parties!”

“Tell that to Gabe,” Alfie grumbled, and Cas left him and went to his room.

Cas sat and thought about Dean and the weekend. He hadn’t even dated since he quit drinking. 

But that led him to another, troubling thought. He had been with anyone since he quit drinking. And, he’d never had a sexual experience sober in his life. What if Dean really wanted to have sex with him? What if he sucked at it? What if he was only good when he was drunk? 

His thoughts began to spiral. He was going to let Dean down. Dean would expect him to be good in bed, and he didn’t know… couldn’t know if he was. Dean would laugh at him, throw him out, never want to see him again…

He started to hyperventilate. He felt like he was dying, but this wasn’t his first anxiety attack. He knew what to do.

The first thing was to control his breathing. He grabbed the first thing in reach, which was his phone. He clutched it to his chest and began to count. He tried to count slowly, matching his breath the the count.

He got control after a bit, and began to feel marginally better. He was sweaty, and still felt lightheaded, so a shower at the moment probably wasn’t a good idea. Instead he went downstairs and found a benadryl, got a glass of water, and gulped it down.

He started to feel a lot better, so he went to take a shower. That helped too.

He finally fell into a deep sleep filled with dreams he couldn’t remember when he woke up.

 


	6. Chapter 6

Cas threw some things in a duffel bag and went to work. Dean didn’t show up that morning, but Cas just figured he was busy, and that he would pick him up at four. He did kind of miss Dean but he kept busy.

It didn’t keep the day from seeming to last forever. He looked at the clock and sighed.

Finally, Meg arrived. Cas could have hugged her, but he just went and got his duffle bag and sat down at a table. Meg tried to ask what he was doing, but just then, Dean walked in.

He walked up to the table and Cas stood up. Dean leaned forward and gave him a light kiss. Meg grinned and said, “Oooo!” Cas smiled at her and told her to shut up.

He followed Dean out of the shop and looked around for the bike. It was nowhere to be seen. Instead, there was a black classic car. Dean walked up to it and opened the rider’s door.

“Is this yours?”

Dean beamed. “Yeah, this is my number one baby. I just figured it would be easier to get you and your bag home. Hop in!”

Cas got in and watched Dean walk around, running his hand over the fender when he did. He got behind the wheel and started it up.

“I missed you this morning.”

Dean glanced at him. “Yeah, sorry about that. Had to go to the job and fill out some paperwork. I missed you too.”

They got to Dean’s place quickly, and got out. Walking to the front door, Dean put his hand on the small of Cas’ back.

When they got inside and the door was shut, Dean grabbed Cas and kissed him. It wasn’t like the other kisses they had exchanged. This one was urgent, hot, intense. Dean pushed his tongue into Cas’ mouth.

All the fears of last night flooded into Cas. He pulled away.

“Wait, Dean… wait…”

Dean looked concerned. “What? What is it, Cas? What’s wrong?”

Cas went and sat on the couch with a sigh.

“I’m… I’m just not ready. It’s not you, Dean…”

Dean sat next to Cas on the couch. He chuckled.

“If you say it’s not you, it’s me, I’ll throw you out.”

Cas looked at him and smiled a little.

“But it’s true.”

“Look, Cas. I like you. I don’t expect you to do anything you aren’t ready to do. I told you we didn’t need to do anything, and I meant it. I’m willing to wait.”

Cas sighed. “I won’t make you wait forever, I promise. I really like you too. It’s just… I’ve got some stuff to work out. You’re the first guy I’ve been out with since I quit drinking.”

Dean’s face showed a flicker of surprise, but it quickly passed.

“You know I’m here for you, right? You can talk to me, Cas. About anything.”

Cas looked into Dean’s eyes, then leaned over and kissed him.

“Thank you, Dean.”

Dean put his hands on either side of Cas’ face and kissed him. Cas pressed his lips against Dean’s plush, warm lips. Dean deepened the kiss and Cas opened his mouth, urging in Dean’s tongue.

Cas had no idea how long they kissed, but when they finally broke away, his lips felt swollen and a little sore. Dean’s face was flush and he was a little breathless. He stared at Cas’ mouth.

Cas smiled. “You cooked?”

Dean stood up and pulled Cas to his feet.

“Don’t get all worked up, it’s just chili.”

Cas grinned. “Well, I love chili. “

They walked to the kitchen, where Dean walked to a crock pot and lifted the lid. A wonderful aroma filled the room and made Cas’ mouth water.

Dean declared it done, and scooped up bowls full and sat them out, with shredded cheese and crackers. They each had a coke.

Cas ate two bowls, much to Dean’s delight. He sat back and rubbed his stomach.

“That was amazing, Dean.”

Dean grinned, standing up to rinse the bowls. “You’re just impressed that I can cook, admit it..” He turned and wiped his hands on the towel.

“Now, how about some Netflix?”

They were thrilled when they discovered they both loved  _ Priscilla, Queen of the Desert.  _ They curled up on the couch together and watched it.  Midway through, Dean made popcorn.

Cas leaned against Dean watching the movie. He was surprised that Dean didn’t expect him to have sex. Few men would have been as patient as Dean was being. 

Cas sighed, and kissed Dean’s cheek. Dean looked at him with surprise.

“What was that for?”

Cas smiled and took a handful of popcorn. “Just for being you.”

Dean chuckled. “Well, it’s easy to be me when you’ve been doing it as long as I have.”

Cas elbowed him and grinned.

The movie ended. It was still early, so Dean asked about watching another movie.

Cas took a deep breath. “I was thinking… maybe… we could just, I don’t know…  _ talk _ ?”

Dean nodded. “Okay, what do you want to talk about?”

“You. Your family. What it was like for you, growing up.”

Dean stared at him for a moment, then smiled.

“Well, okay, I guess. Uh, I have a younger brother. Just graduated from college. He’s a lawyer.”

Cas was seriously impressed. “Wow, Dean. A lawyer? You must be so proud of him.”

Dean beamed. “Yeah, I am. He always was a nerd, yannow?”

Cas nodded. “Where does he live?”

Dean’s smile faded just a little. “He decided to stay in California.”

Cas put a hand on Dean’s. “I’m sorry.”

Dean laughed. “Hey, it’s okay! We visit.”

“So, how do your folks feel about him staying in California?”

Dean looked away. “They’re both dead.”

Cas felt like falling through the floor.   
“Oh fuck, Dean, I’m sorry! I never should have…”

Dean cut him off. “It’s fine, Cas. You had no way of knowing.”

Cas nodded but still felt awful.

Dean glanced at the clock. “Shit, it’s getting late. We should hit the sack, got a big day planned tomorrow. Come on.” He stood up and pulled Cas up by his hand.

Cas followed Dean down a hall. Dean pushed open a door.

“There’s the bathroom. The bedroom is right there.” He indicated the next door.

Cas went and got his bag and carried it into the bathroom. He changed into sleep pants and an old T shirt. He brushed his teeth and then went to the bedroom.

Dean was changed into sweats and a T shirt. He looked Cas up and down.

“Okay! Just give me a second, and then we can get to bed.” He left the room.

Cas looked around. There was a queen size bed, night stands and a big chest of drawers. He walked around and sat on the bed.

Dean came back in and shut off the overhead light, just leaving the bedside lamp to light the room. He pulled back the covers, slid in and smiled at Cas.

Cas got in and turned on his side away from Dean.

“Good night, Dean.”

“Good night, Cas, sleep well.” 

And then the room was dark.

 


	7. Chapter 7

Cas woke up in the dead of night, sweating and shaking. He’d had  _ that  _ nightmare again. He looked at Dean, sleeping peacefully in the moonlight. At least he hadn’t woken Dean up. He slipped out of bed and walked barefooted and quiet to the bathroom. 

He looked at himself in the mirror. His hair was sticking up at odd angles and he patted it down with his hand. He pissed and then went to the living room. He sat on the couch and pulled his legs up, wrapping his arms around them and put his head down.

He didn’t want to cry, so he bit the inside of his cheek and sighed. Sleep was not in the cards now. It never was after that nightmare. He figured he’d just wait out the night. Sooner or later, Dean would wake up.

It was a lot sooner than Cas expected.

The room was suddenly bathed in light. Dean stood there, scratching his belly.

“Cas? What’s wrong?”

Cas let go of his legs and straightened himself out. 

“Dean. I’m sorry I woke you up.”

Dean walked over and sat next to him on the couch.

“You didn’t. I woke up and you were gone.”

Cas sighed. “I had a nightmare. I can’t go back to sleep.”

Dean looked worried.

“A nightmare? Why didn’t you wake me up?”

Cas looked down. “I have them a lot. I didn’t want to bother you.”

Dean reached out and put a hand on Cas’ leg.

“It wouldn’t have bothered me, Cas.”

Cas smiled a little. “Well then you’d be the first one it didn’t bother. Everyone tells me to just suck it up, go back to sleep.”

Dean frowned. “Well, they were just dicks then. I would never tell you that. Do you want to talk about it?”

Cas thought about it. Did he want to talk to Dean about it? He probably needed to. It would give Dean better insight into just how broken Cas really was. It was going to have to be addressed sooner or later. Maybe it was best to just get it over with; yank off the bandage quickly to make it hurt less.

Cas nodded, never looking at Dean.

Dean sighed, slapped his thighs and stood up. “Let’s get some coffee going, and then we’ll talk.”

They sat on the couch, thighs touching, and sipped coffee. Cas took a deep breath.

“Okay, I need to give you some background. Uh, my family… they were very conservative, fundamentally religious. Just mean and awful people. I was thirteen when Gabe came out as being bi. He was seventeen. They threw him out of the house.”

Dean frowned and squeezed Cas’ hand.

“I already knew I was gay by then, so I was scared. I started drinking. I got caught drunk, having sex with a boy in my bedroom a year later. They.. they knew I was too young to throw out… so they…”

Dean waited while Cas took a shuddering breath.

“They sent me to a conversion place. You know… convert the gays into straights?”

Dean sucked in a breath. “Fuck! I’m so sorry, Cas.”

Cas nodded. He was trying not to cry, but one tear slipped out and ran down his cheek.

“They tortured us. Beat us. Called us every nasty name in the book. And when that didn’t work, they… they raped me.”

Dean stiffened. His voice was reduced to a growl. “They raped you? The men who were supposed to make you not gay anymore?”

Cas tried a smile but it came out more like a grimace. “Yeah. They said it was supposed to teach us that it really doesn’t feel good. But they were all just pervs.”

Dean grabbed Cas in a tight hug. 

“Baby, I’m so sorry that happened to you. I could kill them with my bare hands.”

Cas sniffed and buried his head in Dean’s chest.

When they broke apart, Dean asked, “So that’s what the nightmare is about?”

Cas nodded. 

“They threw me out when I was seventeen too. Gabe took me in. So as annoying as he is, I owe him. And I need to take care of Alfie.”

Dean nodded. “How did Alfie end up with you guys?”

“My folks got killed in a car wreck a year after they threw me out. My oldest brothers, Mike and Raph, took over. They are just as bad as my parents were, maybe worse. Alfie just wanted out, so we took him.”

Dean nodded. It was obvious he was upset, and Cas felt guilty that he was the one who upset him. But it had to come out sooner or later.

“So,” Cas looked at Dean, “now you know just how broken I am. Add to that the fact that I’ve never had sex sober and I’m the loser of the year. I don’t even know if I’m any good sober. And frankly I’m afraid to find out.”

Dean put his hand under Cas’ chin and turned his face to look Dean in the eye.

“Listen to me. You’re not as broken as you think you are. You’re strong. You made it this far. It takes guts to survive that. And I know you’d be amazing in bed. I’m hoping you’ll let me show you eventually, but if you’re never ready, I’m not going anywhere. You’re stuck with me.”

Cas shook his head. “I don’t need your pity.”

Dean jumped up and stood in front of Cas, “ _ Pity _ ? You think I pity you? Fuck that. You got past it. You’re strong. I don’t pity you, I think you’re the strongest person I ever met. I just want a chance to show you.”

Cas looked shocked and then sad. “I’m sorry, I’m just not used to anyone believing in me. I… I want to make you proud of me.”

Dean knelt down in front of Cas. He took his hands.

“I already am proud of you. You lived through hell and here you are, sitting in front of me.”

Cas leaned forward and kissed him. 

Dean grabbed the back of Cas’ neck and pulled him into it, deepening it until Cas couldn’t breath, couldn’t think… he could only feel.

When Dean pulled away, he smiled. “Hungry? I could eat a horse. Come on.”

He grabbed one of Cas’ hands and pulled him up.

“Gonna make pancakes. The sun will be up soon.”

 


	8. Chapter 8

They ate their pancakes, which had turned into bacon, fried potatoes and pancakes. Dean grinned at him.

“So, I was thinking we could go on a picnic today. The weather is nice. You know a place we could go?”

“I do! It’s a few miles outside of town, but it’s a beautiful spot and pretty secluded.”

Dean smiled as he stood up and grabbed the plates. “Sounds perfect! I’ll fix us some food.”

Cas wandered the house while Dean made sandwiches. He looked at photos, some of Dean and a pretty blond woman, probably his mother, and some of him and a tall, gangly boy with longish hair. Cas figured it was Dean’s brother.

He got dressed, and was just putting on his shoes when Dean came in the bedroom. He kissed the top of Cas’ head and grabbed his clothes.

Cas sat and watched Dean dress. He loved Dean’s body, what he’d seen of it anyway. He felt a longing he hadn’t felt in over a year. Sighing, he went to wait for Dean in the living room.

Dean came out and walked to Cas. “You okay?”

Cas hurried to smile. “Yeah, great. Ready?”

Dean smiled back. “Just need to get a couple blankets and we’ll go.”

In the car, Cas looked out the side window and thought about how he was feeling. He really liked Dean and he knew Dean liked him too. He knew what he wanted. He just had to get past his fear and insecurities to get there.

Dean switched on the radio to an oldies station and began to sing along. Cas turned to look at him with a grin. 

“You have a very good voice, Dean. You should sing more.”

Dean blushed. “Thanks.”

Cas directed them out of town, and after a bit, he told Dean to turn down a narrow country road. When they came to a dead end, Cas told him they needed to walk to the spot. Dean grabbed the basket and Cas carried the blankets.

They went through some trees and suddenly came out into a meadow. There was a big pond and a lot of flowers.

Dean took a breath. “It’s beautiful, Cas.”

Cas nodded, smiling. “I used to come here a lot. Haven’t been in a while.”

Cas spread out the blankets and they sat down. Dean opened the basket and got out sandwiches and a couple of bottles of water. They ate, looking out over the water. Birds were singing in the trees and a frog breached the surface of the pond.

When they finished, Dean laid back on the blanket. Cas looked at him with a smile. Dean wiggled his fingers, urging Cas to lay with him.

Cas laid down next to Dean and put his head on Dean’s shoulder. They laid there for a bit, just enjoying the peace. Then, Dean turned and kissed Cas on the top of his head.

Cas looked up and him, and then they were kissing. Tentative at first, light, but then it became deeper, hotter.

Cas opened his mouth for Dean’s tongue to explore, and Dean ran his hand over Cas’ chest.

Cas was hard in his jeans, and when Dean turned towards him. Cas could feel Dean’s very hard cock press against his thigh through Dean’s jeans. Cas moaned.

Dean kissed down Cas’ throat, one hand on Cas’ cheek and the other was pulling Cas’ T shirt up. Cas arched his back to help.

Then Dean had his mouth on a nipple, sucking and nipping at it and Cas moaned again.

Dean licked down Cas’ belly to the waist of his jeans. Cas stiffened.

Dean looked up at him. “Cas, I want to taste you so bad. Please… let me?”

Cas took a shaky deep breath and looked into those shining green eyes. He nodded.

Dean undid the button and slowly unzipped his jeans. Then he pulled them down, along with his underwear to just above his knees. Cas’ cock stood hard, a pearl of precum at the tip.

Dean smiled at him. “Thank you. I promise, I’ll take good care of you.”

He licked the precum from the head and Cas gasped. 

Then Dean took just the head into his mouth. Cas put a hand on Dean’s head, very lightly. He couldn’t believe how good it felt. It has been so long, too long.

Dean sucked lightly on the head, and then sucked in his cheeks and moved his mouth down Cas’ length. It hit the back of Dean’s throat and Cas groaned.

“Dean… Dean… it’s good. It’s so good…”

Dean’s mouth was warm and wet and his tongue was swirling around the shaft. Cas felt like he could lose his mind with the feeling. He resisted thrusting up, but oh, he wanted to.

Dean began fondling Cas’ balls as he sucked up and down. Cas thrashed his head from side to side, saying Dean’s name over and over.

It began in his balls, the warmth spreading into his gut. 

He moaned out that he was going to come, but Dean didn’t take his mouth away. Instead, when Cas tipped over the edge, Dean took every drop and swallowed it. He sucked a little bit more then let Cas’ softening cock drop out of his mouth.

Cas lay trying to catch his breath as Dean moved back up and kissed his forehead.

Cas opened his eyes to see Dean’s smile.

“Dean… that was… incredible.”

Dean laughed. “Good, because that was what I was going for.”

Cas sat up and pushed Dean down on his back. He kissed Dean and palmed his hand over Dean’s hard dick.

“Cas, you don’t have to. It’ll go down.”

Cas shook his head. “I want to, Dean. I really want to.”

Cas’ hands shook as he tried to undo Dean’s jeans. Dean put a hand over Cas’.

“You don’t have to.”

Cas looked at him with a frown.

“I really want to. Honestly.”

All the time he was undoing Dean’s jeans and pulling them and Dean’s boxers down, he kept up a litany in his head, ‘You got this. You can do it, it’s just like riding a bike…”

When Dean’s cock popped out, Cas looked at it. It was beautiful, straight, thick and long, and uncut. Cas felt his mouth begin to water at the sight of it.

Cas grabbed Dean’s cock firmly in one hand, and used the other to push back the foreskin. Dean moaned and it was music to Cas’ ears.

Cas took it in his mouth. It felt amazing. He didn’t realize how much he missed feeling the weight of a nice cock on his tongue, the feeling of the slick skin when he played his mouth over it. He sucked down as far as he could, not wanting to gag. He used his hand on the rest.

He loved the musk of Dean, his scent. 

He sucked and swirled his tongue until Dean was groaning out that he was going to come. He pulled his mouth back to just the head and waited. Then the salty spend was filling his mouth, and it tasted wonderful. He’d missed this so much. He swallowed.

 


	9. Chapter 9

Dean pulled him up and kissed him. Then he pulled back and searched Cas’ face.

“Are you okay?”

Cas smiled. “I am! I forgot how much I enjoy doing that.”

Dean threw back his head and laughed.

“Well, you’re certainly good at it.”

Cas kissed him and kissed him and kissed him.

Clothes back in order, they packed up and walked back to the car. Dean turned on the radio and Cas smiled at him while he sang along.

When they got home, Dean unlocked the door, then turned to Cas.

“Can you… will you spend the night with me again?”

Cas nodded, looking shy. “I’d really like that.”

Dean fired up Netflix and they watched a movie until dinner time. Cas called home to check in with Alfie. Dean fixed cheeseburgers and they ate in the living room, watching another movie.

When the movie was over, Cas went upstairs to piss. When he was walking back to the stairs, he heard his phone ring. He went into the bedroom and checked who was calling.

It was Gabe. Cas sighed and thought about not answering, but then, what if there was a problem with Alfie?

“Yeah, Gabe, what’s up?”

“I need you to bail me out of jail.”

Cas couldn’t believe it. “What? What did you do?”

Gabe laughed. “Well, Balth and I got kind of busy… you know, in an alley and a cop saw us. I’m charged with public indecency.”

Cas sighed. “I’m surprised this is the first time. How much do you need?”

“Five hundred.”

Cas didn’t realize he was yelling. “What? I don’t have that kind of money just laying around! Where am I supposed to get five hundred dollars this time of night?”

Then he heard Dean say, “I can loan it to you.”

He whirled around to see Dean standing in the doorway. He put the phone to his chest.

“Dean, I can’t let you do that. I’ll figure something out.”

Dean walked over to him. “I don’t know what’s going on, but I can loan it to you, no problem. What’s your alternative?”

Cas sighed. He brought the phone back to his ear. 

“Gabe, I’ll be there in a while. But you are going to pay this back, understand?”

He hung up while Gabe was talking.

“My brother’s in jail. He needs to be bailed out.”

Dean kissed Cas on the nose. “Well, let’s go bail him out then.”

In the car, Cas told Dean what Gabe was in jail for.

“My family’s a mess. I’m a mess. Honestly, Dean, you don’t know what you’re getting into here.”

Dean glanced at him. “Well, I like you. A lot. So I guess I can take your family if it means I have you in my life.”

Cas sighed. “You’ll be sorry.”

Dean just smiled. “First stop, an ATM.”

 

Gabe was grinning when he came out to the waiting area where Dean and Cas had been sitting for over an hour.

“Thanks, Cassie. I would have had to sit in here all weekend, and that would leave Alfie alone. And this is your new beau?”

Cas sighed. “Yeah, like you give a shit about Alfie. And Dean? This is my ne'er-do-well brother Gabriel.”

Dean held his hand out and Gabe shook it.

“Is he hung, Cassie? Cause I’d definitely bend over and grab my ankles for this one.”

Dean looked shocked. 

“You are disgusting, Gabe.”

Gabe chuckled. “So, that’s a no to a threesome?”

Dean shook his head. “Yeah, not going to happen.”

In the car on the way back to Gabe’s, he told them exactly what had happened. Gabe had been blowing Barth in an alley when a cop walked up to them. Balth was still in jail, not having anyone to bail him out.

“He’ll be pissed, but he’ll get over it.” Gabe laughed as he said it.

“You’re a horrible person, Gabe.”

Gabe laughed even harder. “True, but you still love me.”

They left Gabe at home, checked on Alfie and went back to Dean’s.

Dean grinned at Cas when they got back in the car.

“Your brother is a real piece of work.”

Cas sighed. “I told you.”

Dean nodded. “That you did. But it doesn’t change how I feel about you.”

Cas looked at him and smiled. “Are you sure you’re real?”

Dean laughed. “I think that blow job I gave you was real enough.”

Cas couldn’t argue with that.

It was late when they got home, so they went to bed. They wore their boxers, Cas was still a little shy about getting into bed with Dean naked. 

Cas looked at Dean’s tattoos. He traced some with his finger. They were intricate and so beautiful, they took Cas’ breath away.

“You’ve got to tell me the stories behind these, Dean.”

Dean looked at his arm. “I will, but not tonight. Come here.”

He turned the light off and pulled Cas in to cuddle against him and Cas put his head on Dean’s shoulder. Cas sighed contentedly and fell into a dreamless sleep.

He woke up in the middle of the night. They were spooning, and Dean’s erection was poking into Cas’ ass. He wanted to move, but then he didn’t want to. He lay there and thought about the blow jobs they exchanged. Maybe he was more ready to start a physical relationship with Dean than he thought he was. 

But no, the thought of having sex still made his stomach flip. He needed more time. He just hoped Dean could wait for him to be ready. He said he was, but Cas knew men like Dean wouldn’t wait forever.

He went back to sleep, still feeling very unsure about the whole thing. The next time he woke up, it was to an empty bed and the aroma of coffee. He sat on the edge of the bed, rubbing his eyes. He got up, pulled on some sweats and walked downstairs.

Dean was leaning against the counter with a cup of coffee. He smiled at Cas.

“Morning, sunshine. Thought you’d sleep all day.”

Cas gumbled and got a cup of coffee, sitting at the table and taking a drink.

Dean smiled and sat down too. “Okay! Not a morning person then.”

 


	10. Chapter 10

After breakfast, Dean led Cas to the couch. 

“You wanted to know the symbolism behind my ink? I’ll tell you about one arm. If you want to know any more, you have to promise to come back and spend the weekend with me.”

Cas smiled. “I promise, Dean.”

Dean held out his right arm. He pointed at the snakes that went around his forearm. 

“These stand for transformation and change. They were the first ones I ever got.”

Going up his arm were vines and leaves that hid a fox.

“The fox symbolizes sexual power,” he laughed. “I got that one when I was about eighteen and thought it would help me with virility.”

At his shoulder there was a cherry blossom “This stands for the beauty of life. I kind of thought I’d be dead by my early twenties, so I wanted a reminder to always see the beauty.”

Cas listened intently. 

“Actually, these make more questions than answers, Dean.”

Dean kissed him lightly. “I know, but those are other stories for other times.”

Cas nodded. But he knew it was getting late.

“Dean, I’ve got to go home. I need to check on Alfie and do some wash, get ready for work tomorrow.”

Dean sighed. “Okay. When can I see you again? I’ve got to start work tomorrow.”

Cas thought. “How about dinner on Wednesday? Alfie has a standing study group then.”

Dean frowned. “I gotta wait until Wednesday? Fuck, I don’t know if I can wait that long.”

Cas laughed. “You’ll live.”

Cas collected his stuff and grabbed his bag. Dean drove him home.

“I really enjoyed this weekend, Cas. A lot.”

Cas nodded. “I did too. Thank you, Dean.”

Dean kissed him, but Cas broke away before it got too intense. He got out, turned and waved at Dean with a smile. Dean waved back and drove away.

Cas walked in. Gabe was sitting on the couch with Kali.

“Cassie! Home again. Here, need a pillow to sit on?”

Cas shook his head. “Shut it Gabe.”

He walked to the kitchen, where Alfie was sitting working on homework.

He ruffled the kid’s hair. “Hey Alf, how are you doing?”

Alfie looked up and smirked. “I’m okay. How was your weekend?”

Cas grinned. “It was great. Gabe behave himself?”

“Did Gabe behave himself?” Alfie snorted. “Pretty much. He and Kali got pretty loud this morning, but what else is new.”

Cas sighed. “Yeah, what else.” 

He went and gathered up his dirty clothes and took them to the washing machine. When he had the machine going, he leaned against it, lost in thought.

He thought about Dean and how wonderful he was, about how he didn’t get mad or freak about the nightmare, and of course, he thought about the blow jobs.

He could see that Dean was the kind of man he could really fall for, but he needed not to. Eventually, Dean would see Cas for the mess he was, or he’d get tired of waiting for Cas to be ready to have sex. He went to his room and laid down on the bed.

There was a knock on the door, and Gabe came in. He walked over and sat on the bed.

“Little bro, how are you doing, really? I know I’m a smart ass, but that doesn’t mean I don’t care about you.”

Cas sighed. “I know, Gabe. And I’m fine.”

Gabe looked at him. “Don’t try to kid a kidder, Cas, I know you aren’t fine. What’s up with your new guy? Problems?”

Cas rubbed his eyes. “Dean is amazing. He’s patient and kind… It’s me, Gabe.”

Gabe waited for Cas to continue.

“I’m afraid to have sex, Gabe. I only had sex when I was drunk. And now… that I’m sober… I keep thinking of what they… did to me… in the camp.”

Gabe put a hand on Cas’ shoulder.

“Listen, I know it was bad. But unless you’re going to be celibate for the rest of your life, you’re going to have to get past that. I think, if Dean is as amazing as you say he is, you should give him a chance.”

Cas nodded. “I know. I’m trying.”

“Have you told Dean anything about that?”

Cas nodded. “I told him they raped me. I didn’t tell him how often or how… how many of them there were. And I haven’t told him I’m scared.”

Gabe stood up. He looked down at Cas. “Well, I think you’re going to have to, if you want him in your life. It’s up to you, Cas, but I’d give him a real chance.”

Gabe left and Cas laid down again, thinking about what Gabe said.

Cas got a text from Dean before he went to bed.

 

_ Hey beautiful. Just want you to know I miss you and my bed is empty and cold _

 

Cas texted him back.

 

_ Hey there yourself, handsome. I miss you too _

 

Dean texted back a heart emoji and  _  Sleep well and I’ll try to sleep without you in my arms. Looking forward to Wednesday _

 

Cas sent back a heart emoji and went to bed.

The next day at work, Cas couldn’t stop himself from looking up every time the door opened, wishing it was Dean. Meg grilled him when she came in, but Cas didn’t tell her anything but that he’d had fun with Dean and that they’d gone on a picnic.

That night he helped Alfie with some homework and then fell in his bed. He grabbed his phone and thought about texting Dean.

Then his phone chimed.

 

_ Hey beautiful. I thought about you all day. Hope your day was good.  _

 

Smiling, Cas texted back.

 

_ Hey yourself. I missed you too. Day was long and boring. Yours? _

 

_ It was about the same. Worked on a corvette, that was the only good thing about it. Can’t wait until Wednesday. Good night, have sweet dreams for me, okay? _

 

Cas texted back that he hoped Dean had sweet dreams too.

He went to bed with a smile on his face.

 

 


	11. Chapter 11

By the time it was Wednesday, Cas had decided to tell Dean everything. They had agreed that Cas would drive to Dean’s at five. Cas was nervous as hell. His palms were sweaty and he had to control his breathing to tamp down an anxiety attack.

When he got there, Dean’s car was in the driveway. Cas took a couple of deep breaths and knocked.

Dean opened the door, grabbed Cas and pulled him into a long, deep kiss. 

When they broke apart, Dean smiled. 

“Man, I’ve been thinking about doing that for three days. Dinner will be in about an hour.”

Cas looked into those amazing green eyes and took another deep breath.

“Dean, sit down. We need to talk.”

Dean’s eyebrows went up and he got a very worried look. 

“Uh, sure, Cas. Are you going to break up with me?”

Cas led him to the couch. “No, Dean, but I need to come clean about a few things.”

Dean sat next to Cas and waited.

“Okay, Dean. I told you some stuff about the conversion therapy, but I didn’t tell you everything. I need to, to make you understand, well why I am the way I am.”

Cas looked at Dean and sent out a silent prayer that Dean didn’t throw him out when he was done.

“I told you they… raped me. But I didn’t tell you how many times, and how many of them there were.”

Dean looked somewhere between angry and incredibly sad.

Cas looked away. “Dean, it lasted for weeks. They would… they would take turns. Over and over...  There were five of them.”

Dean made a sound in his throat that sounded like an animal growling.

“Cas…”

“Let me finish. When Gabe got me out, all I did was drink. I stayed drunk twenty four hours a day for months. Even after that, I got drunk every day. I started letting men pick me up in bars, having sex in the bathrooms or maybe they’d get a room. Anonymous sex with men I didn’t know, never asked their names and I never told them mine.”

Cas sighed. He didn’t look at Dean because he was sure if he saw the look Dean must have on his face, it would break his heart.

“Then I got alcohol poisoning and almost died. I got sent to a care facility to dry out. And the rest is history. But that’s why I’m so afraid to have… have sex. I got tested, and thank god I’m clean. But the idea of having sex sober scares the shit out of me.”

He finally looked at Dean. 

Dean had tears running down his face. 

“Oh baby, my sweet baby, I’m so sorry. I am so sorry that happened to you. I understand. I really do. And I’m willing to wait. I told you I was and I still am. Oh Cas…”

Dean pulled Cas into a tight hug.

Cas couldn’t believe it. Dean didn’t hate him? Wasn’t disgusted by what Cas did, what he was… before? He put his face into Dean’s chest and hugged him back.

Cas pulled away. “Dean, aren’t you… you know, disgusted? I mean I was a slut.”

Dan smiled at him. “Cas, you were a victim. You had no control over what happened to you. And with the PTSD you must have had, I’m not surprised you acted out. What does surprise me is that you let me blow you. You must have been terrified. Not to mention reciprocating.”

Cas looked away shyly. “I was at first, but then… it felt so good, Dean. Both of them felt amazing.”

Dean grinned at him. “They felt amazing to me too.”

Dean stood up. “Let’s eat. I hope you like spaghetti.”

Cas stood up. “Love it.”

Cas felt lighter than he had in a long time. He followed Dean to the kitchen. Dean stirred the sauce and started the pasta.

Dinner was wonderful. Cas just kept complimenting Dean on his cooking. Finally Dean said it didn’t make him a chef, making chili and spaghetti.

“Well, It’s more than I can do,” Cas grinned at him.

Dean stood up and started to clear the table. “Okay, can’t cook. Noted.”

“You should let me do the dishes.”

Dean shook his head. “No way. I’m not wasting the limited time we have on doing any dishes.”

They sat on the couch. Dean took Cas’ hand.

“Cas, I’m really proud of you for telling me. That you trusted me enough to tell me.”

“Dean, I do trust you. You’re the first man I’ve ever told. And frankly, you have Gabe to thank.”

Dean looked shocked. “Gabe?”

Cas chuckled. “Yeah, I know. He’s an asshole, but he had his moments. He sat me down and told me I needed to tell you everything, or else risking losing you.”

Dean shook his head. “I guess I’ll have to thank him next time I see him. You said, ‘risk losing me.’ Does that mean we’re boyfriends?” 

Dean’s eyes were twinkling.

Cas blushed. “Well, I’d like to be,”

Dean grinned. “It’s official! We’re boyfriends.”

This led to kissing, which led to Cas in Dean’s lap, straddling his thighs.

They were both hard. Dean had his hands on Cas’ hips and they ground together as Dean explored Cas’ mouth with his tongue. 

Dean stilled and tightened his grip on Cas’ hips..

“Cas, we gotta stop or I’m gonna come in my pants.”

Cas smiled and scooted back. He reached down and unzipped Dean’s zipper. While Dean watched with lust blown eyes, Cas reached in and grabbed Dean’s dick and pulled it out.

The second Cas’ hand touched his cock, Dean groaned and leaned back. Cas let a tendril of spit fall onto the head and then he wrapped his fingers around the shaft.

He ran his hand up and down, with a twist on the up slide, Dean moaned.

Dean reached down and stopped Cas. Cas looked up at him with a questioning look.

Dean unzipped Cas’ jeans and pulled his cock out. He laid it next to his own and spit in his hand. He wrapped his large hand around both cocks and began to run his hand up and down them. Cas groaned. He reached down and wrapped his hand over Dean’s.

Dean  came first, moaning out Cas’ name. Cas followed just a few strokes later. The cum spilled over both their hands.

Cas rolled off Dean’s lap. They both had wet spots on their pants, which made Dean chuckle. 

“I’m sorry, babe. Didn’t think that through. I can loan you sweats to go home in.”

Cas grinned and nodded. “Thanks.”

“I wish you didn’t have to go, though.”

Cas sighed. “I wish I didn’t either. But I’m definitely staying this weekend.”

Dean got up and tucked himself back in. “That’s two days away.”

Cas grinned. “Go and get me those sweats.”

  
  



	12. Chapter 12

Cas told Alfie he wouldn't be back that weekend and Alfie gave him a thumbs up. He packed his bag and went to work. The day drug, but at last it was time to go to Dean's. He got in his car and drove there, but Dean's car wasn't in the driveway. Then his phone chimed.

 

_ Hey babe. Got held up at work. There's a spare key under the mat. Go on in, I'll be there in a half an hour. _

 

Cas got his bag, found the key and let himself in. He put his bag in the bedroom and went back out to sit on the couch to wait. Curiosity got the better of him, and he went to Dean's desk and opened the drawer. Mostly it was just the usual stuff you'd find in a desk, but then he saw the manila envelope at the bottom. He got it out and opened it.

He couldn't believe what was in it. There was a birth certificate, naming Dean as the father of a baby boy, born four years ago. There were pictures of Dean with a brunette and a baby.

Cas heard Dean's motorcycle pull in the driveway. He was torn, wanting to put the envelope back where he'd found it, but he also wanted to know what this was really about.

Dean walked in with a big smile on his face, which quickly faded when he saw Cas and what he was holding in his hand.

"Dean..."

Dean sighed and walked to Cas, taking the envelope and putting it back in the drawer. Then he looked at Cas.

"His name is Ben. It was a huge mistake I made five years ago."

Cas sighed and walked to the couch. Dean followed him and they both sat down.

"You were with his mother?"

Dean rubbed his eyes. "Yeah, for six terrible months. We had no business being in a relationship. But she got pregnant. I wanted to do the right thing, but she knew better. She threw me out, had the baby. She was right, we never should have been together in the first place. But I thought I wanted a family, the home with the picket fence... I was wrong. I didn't want that at all. At least, not with a woman."

Cas sat quietly. Then he asked, "Do you get to see him?"

Dean sighed. "Only occasionally. She got married two years ago. A dentist. I don't fit with her idea of a father."

Cas looked at Dean. "I'm sorry, Dean. That has to be hard."

"It is, but I can deal with it. I'm sorry I didn't tell you, Cas."

Cas smiled at him. "I understand, Dean. It's not like you could have said, 'by the way, I was with a woman and have a kid'."

Dean smiled back at Cas. "I was going to tell you. I just didn't know when was the right time."

"It's okay, Dean. We both have pasts. You didn't hold mine against me, it would be stupid for me to hold yours against you."

Dean put his hands on either side of Cas' face and ran his thumbs along Cas' cheekbones. 

"How did I get so lucky?"

Cas grinned. "I think I'm the lucky one, Dean."

They kissed for a while, but then Dean leaned back.'

"Man, I'm starving. What do you want to do for dinner?"

Cas grinned. "Your choice."

They ended up doing a burger run. They sat on the floor, eating their cheeseburgers and fries and watching a movie.

When it was over, Dean shut the TV off and kissed Cas. His tongue pushed against Cas' lips and Cas opened for it. Dean ran his tongue over Cas' and Cas moaned into Dean's mouth. It got hotter and messier.

Then Dean stood up and pulled Cas up. He took Cas' hand and led him to the bedroom. Cas stood and let Dean pull his shirt over his head and then unbuttoned his pants. When Dean grabbed the zipper, Cas put his hand over Dean's.

"Dean..."

Dean said quietly, "Don't worry, baby, I won't do anything you don't want me to."

Cas let him pull down the zipper and pull his pants and boxers to his ankles. He stepped out of them and stood, naked in front of Dean.

Dean looked him up and down and smiled. "You are so fucking beautiful."

Cas blushed. "And you are so overdressed."

Dean laughed and led Cas to the bed. Cas laid down and watched Dean undress. When Dean pulled his boxers off, his hard cock slapped his belly. Cas groaned at the sight.

Dean crawled over Cas and kissed him. Dean's leaking cock drug over Cas' belly and Cas couldn't help but thrust up a little.

"Yeah, baby, it's good, huh."

Dean kissed down Cas' throat and sucked a mark on it.

"Want everyone to know you're mine."

He worked his way down Cas, nibbling on his nipples and sucking and biting marks as he went lower. Cas fisted the sheets.

When Dean got to Cas' hipbones, he groaned. "You have got the most magnificent hips I've ever seen." He licked over them.

Cas spread his legs and Dean got between them. He looked up at Cas.

"Wanna eat you out, baby. Can I eat your ass?"

Cas didn't answer, just lifted his legs.

Dean sat back and looked at Cas' ass. Then he used his hands to spread Cas open and he put his face there. He licked around Cas hole and Cas gasped and put a hand on Dean's head. Dean licked over his hole and up his perineum, then back to his hole. he began to kiss and lick.

Cas groaned. "Fuck! Dean!"

Dean kept it up until he speared Cas' hole with his tongue.

Cas jerked, and Dean told him to relax. "You taste so good, baby, I could do this all night."

Cas' cock was so hard, it ached. Drops of precum fell on his belly. But he was totally focused on Dean's mouth, his tongue, how good it felt.

Dean added a finger, then two, He found Cas' prostate and rubbed it. Cas moaned and tightened on Dean's fingers. 

Dean still ran his tongue around Cas' hole as he played his fingers in and out. Cas was losing his mind with need. He imagined Dean's cock and thought about how easy it would be for Dean to just slide it in, how good it would feel.

He grabbed a handful of Dean's hair and pulled on it. Dean lifted his head.

"I want you. I need you to... fuck me, Dean."

Dean looked surprised for a moment. "Are you sure, Cas?"

Cas nodded. "I'm sure. I want you to. Please, Dean, fuck me."

 


	13. Chapter 13

Dean sat back on his calves and reached for lube. He made eye contact with Cas while he popped the top and poured some in his hand. Then he dribbled some over Cas' hole. He ran his hand over his cock, lubing it up. His eyes never left Cas'. He pulled Cas' legs over his shoulders and grabbed his cock.

When he pressed against Cas' hole, it resisted a little, but then, the head popped inside. Cas grabbed Dean's shoulders and moaned.

Dean slid in slowly, pausing every few inches to allow Cas to adjust, relax. But then his balls were laying on Cas' ass and he was fully inside. Cas gripped Dean's shoulders harder and Dean groaned.

"My god, baby, you're so tight. You feel so good. Even better than I imagined you would."

He pulled back slowly and thrust back in. Cas cried out.

Dean looked at Cas, concerned.

"No, Dean, it's good. It's so good... please, harder. Fuck me hard."

Dean sat back and pulled his cock all the way out, then watched it slide back into Cas with a snap of his hips.

"Fuck, Cas, you take me so well. Just look at you, pulling my cock inside you..."

He leaned over and began to fuck Cas hard. Cas made sounds he's never heard himself make before. He clung to Dean's arms.

Dean bent Cas in half, pulling his ass off the bed. He pounded in and out of Cas. He groaned out Cas' name with every thrust.

Cas felt his balls tightening. "Dean, I'm coming..."

Dean said in a low voice, "Yeah, baby, cum for me. Let me see you cum."

Cas yelled out Dean's name and shot strings of spend onto his belly and chest. His hole spasmed around Dean's cock and Dean groaned.

Dean came hard, thrusting in and out of Cas wildly. Cas felt every spurt, filling him. When it was over, Dean kept thrusting until he was too soft.

He pulled out of Cas and fell to the bed next to Cas. He looked at Cas, trying to catch his breath, and used a finger to push a lock of Cas' sweaty hair off his forehead.

"Cas, I'm in love with you."

Cas looked at him for a minute and then smiled. 

"I love you too, Dean."

Dean got a wet washcloth and cleaned Cas up.

 

They laid in each other's arms, just basking in the glow of good sex and admissions of love. Cas felt amazing, better than he could ever remember. Dean loved him. Dean was good to him, patient and caring. He couldn't believe this was really happening.

Dean turned over and kissed Cas on the forehead.

"I want to meet Alfie."

Cas lifted his head and looked at Dean. "Really?"

Dean smiled. "Really. I want to get to know your brothers, even Gabe."

Cas chuckled. "You already know Gabe."

Dean shook his head. "Not really. All I know is the asshole. Apparently he has another side to him."

Cas smirked. "Not usually very obvious."

Dean kissed Cas' nose. "Never the less, I want to get to know both of them."

Cas looked curious. "Why?"

"Because they are a big part of my boyfriend's life."

Cas considered that.

"Okay. You can come to dinner. I'll arrange it."

Dean grinned. "Okay. I'm gonna hold you to that." But then his face got serious.

"Cas, are you really okay? No, like, regrets?"

Cas shook his head. "No, not a one. It was wonderful. I'm sorry I made you wait so long."

Dean touched Cas' cheek. "Baby, don't be sorry. I understood. And frankly, I was surprised you said it was okay this time."

Cas pressed his face into Dean's hand, then turned his head and kissed Dean's palm.

"I trust you, Dean. Completely. I know you won't hurt me."

Dean took Cas by the chin and turned Cas' face to look at him. 

"I would never hurt you, Cas. I love you. And I'd fuck up anyone who did hurt you."

Cas batted his eyes. "My hero."

Dean laughed. Cas tried to stifle a yawn, but wasn't entirely successful.

Dean kissed him lightly. "Come on, let's get some sleep."

Cas curled up on his side and Dean spooned up behind him. Dean wrapped an arm over Cas and nuzzled his neck.

"Sweet dreams, baby."

Cas went right to sleep.

Cas woke up first. They were still pressed together and light was streaming around the curtains. He wiggled and yawned, and Dean tightened his grip on Cas' chest.

"Hey, sunshine."

Cas grinned. "Hey yourself, big guy."

Dean nibbled on the back of Cas' neck and Cas giggled. He turned over and faced Dean, kissing him.

When they broke, Cas covered his mouth with a hand.

"Ugh, I've got morning breath."

Dean laughed. "You taste good to me."

Cas laughed too. "That's because you have morning breath too."

"Well then, we cancel each other out."

Dean rolled over on his back and pulled Cas on top of him.

"Now, that's more like it."

Cas smiled but wiggled away. "No, Dean, I need to piss and have a cup of coffee."

Dean frowned. "You're no fun." He watched Cas sit on the edge of the bed.

“You go piss. I’ll start the coffee.”

Cas stood up, blew him a kiss and went to the bathroom.

He pissed, washed his hands and brushed his teeth. He stood for a minute, looking at himself in the mirror. He looked happy. He honestly couldn’t remember if he’d ever looked happy before.

Downstairs, the coffee pot was brewing and Dean stood in the kitchen, naked as the day he was born. Cas looked at his ass before he turned around.

“Nice view, Dean.”

Dean turned around and smiled.

“Now it’s even better,” Cas smirked at him.

Dean wiggled his eyebrows up and down. “Flattery will get you everything, babe.”

Just then the coffee was done. Dean got them both a cup and they carried them to the living room and sat on the couch.

Cas took a sip. “Just how many naked asses have been on this couch, Dean?”

“Exactly two. Yours and mine.”

Cas snorted and took another drink of his coffee.

He sat back. “So, it’s the weekend and I’m here. How about telling me more about your ink?”

 


	14. Chapter 14

Dean stretched out his left arm for Cas to look at. This one just had a half sleeve. It was dominated by a Celtic Dragon.

“The dragon stands for a protector, someone who protects his loved ones. I like to think I’m protective.”

Above the dragon was a hummingbird and a butterfly, hovering over a lily.

“The hummingbird stands for joy and the butterfly is for peace. The Lily is for a lasting relationship and love at first sight. “I think I got all those with you, baby.”

Cas felt like crying. He sniffed and touched the ink.

“They’re so beautiful.”

Dean kissed Cas’ cheek. “Thanks.”

“Now tell me about the quote.”

Dean looked down at his ribs. “It says, ‘the moving finger writes, and having writ, moves on. Not all thy piety nor wit can lure it back to cancel half a line, nor all your tears wash out a word of it.’ It’s from the Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam. It reminds me to not dwell on the past.  Live in the moment.”

Cas nodded. “And the angel on your back?”

Dean had a huge tattoo on his back. It was of an angel, sitting with his head down. The wings were magnificent and spread over both shoulders. The intricacy of the feathers were breathtaking.

Dean smiled. “Ah, my fallen angel. He fell in love with a human man and chose to fall. He gained free will. And he has no regrets.”

Cas thought about that. He had been named after an angel, one who loved the righteous man and fell for him. Surely, they couldn’t be the same angel.

“Dean, uh, my name is short for Castiel…”

Dean’s eyes got big. “That’s the name of  _ my _ angel! Holy fuck, Cas. That’s… that’s just amazing. You’re my angel!”

Cas blushed and shook his head. “I’m no angel, Dean.”

Dean took Cas’ face in his hands. “There you’re wrong. You’re  _ my _ angel.”

Cas couldn’t believe it. Dean had a tattoo of his namesake. What the hell did that even mean? It had to be a coincidence.

“Come on, angel, let’s eat some breakfast. I’m starving.”

Cas laughed and put it out of his mind. “You’re always starving.”

Dean grinned at him. “And your point is?”

They pulled on boxers and T shirts for breakfast after Cas pointed out that it was dangerous to fry things naked.

They ate breakfast and then Dean stood up. He pulled Cas to his feet and pulled him in for a tight hug.

“You know what this righteous man wants right now?”

Cas grinned. “What would that be?”

“He wants his angel, naked in his bed.”

“Does he now?”

Dean laughed, leaned over and grabbed Cas, throwing him over his shoulder.

Cas wiggled and told Dean to put him down as Dean started towards the bedroom. Dean slapped him on the ass.

"Settle down, angel."

Cas squeaked

When Dean got to the bedroom, he dumped Cas on the bed and yanked off Cas' boxers. Then he took off his own T shirt and boxers while Cas took off his shirt.

Dean got on his hands and knees over Cas and kissed him hard. Cas pulled him closer, wrapping his hand around the back of Dean's neck.

Dean sat back and looked at Cas, splayed out on the bed under him. He put his hands on Cas’ chest and ran them down Cas’ body.

“My god you’re perfect, angel.”

Cas blushed and turned his head.

“Dean, I’m not perfect or an an-.”

Dean put a finger against Cas’ lips.

“Shh, Cas. You’re my angel and you’re perfect for me.”

They kissed for a bit, then Dean sat back again. He grabbed the lube and poured some in his hand. Cas spread his legs, and Dean reached between them. Cas lifted his legs. 

Dean ran a finger into Cas. but he was still loose from last night and a second finger slid in easily. He scissored them, watching Cas moan and push back against his hand.

Dean pulled his fingers out and lined up. Cas looked at him and smiled.

“Please, Dean…”

Dean shoved in and never paused until his balls were laying on Cas’ ass. Cas threw his head back against the pillow and groaned.

Dean held, not moving. He pulled Cas up to sit on his lap, chest to chest. Cas looked in his eyes as Dean began to thrust up into him. Cas grabbed Dean’s shoulders and dug his fingers in like he was hanging on for his life.

Cas’ erection was trapped between them and rubbed against Dean’s belly with every thrust. Cas didn’t even try to get his hand on himself, knowing that the friction was enough. He pressed his head on Dean’s shoulder and moaned in Dean’s ear.

Dean was saying how perfect Cas was, how good he felt, how tight he was. Every once in a while he’d say he loved Cas.

Cas whispered in Dean’s ear that he loved him too. It was all he could do to make a sentence, he was so lost in the feeling of Dean’s fat cock inside him, sliding in and out over his rim. It was so good, so intoxicating, Cas almost felt drunk with it.

His orgasm caught him by surprise. He was totally focused on Dean’s cock and suddenly he was coming. Warm cum painted both of them, and Cas yelled out Dean’s name. He came hard, so hard his vision was reduced to pinpricks of light.

Dean gasped when Cas’ hole spasmed and he followed shortly after. Cas moaned at the feeling of being filled over and over with Dean’s warm cum.

They clung to each other, trying to catch their breath. Dean made no move to pull out of Cas until his cock was completely flaccid.  Then he laid Cas on his back and laid down next to him. He pulled Cas half on top of him and kissed Cas’ sweaty forehead.

Dean wrapped his arms around Cas and Cas lay his head on Dean’s shoulder.

“I love you so fucking much, angel, it just blows my mind.”

Doubt and anxiety wiggled their way into Cas’ thoughts. It was too quick, too soon. Dean was just feeling something because they’d finally had sex. Cas had felt unlovable for so long, he couldn’t wrap his head around this. He sighed deeply.

Dean tightened his arms around Cas. “You okay Cas?”

Cas nodded. “I’m fine, Dean.”

But he really wasn’t sure if he was fine or not.

 


	15. Chapter 15

After a short nap, they were up and dressed. Dean turned to Cas.

“What do you want to do today?”

Cas already knew. “I want to take a long ride on your bike.”

Dean grinned. “Sounds good! Let’s go.”

Fifteen minutes later they were roaring down the street. Cas laid his head on Dean’s back and held on to his waist. He sighed with contentment, watching the world rush by.

Dean drove out of town, and eventually stopped. They got off the bike and took off their helmets, standing and looking at the road. Dean took Cas’ hand.

“I was thinking, you think Alfie would like a ride?”

Cas looked at him and smiled. “I know he would. You want to take him?”

Dean nodded. “I want to get to know him, just like I said. I think it would be nice to take him on the bike.”

Cas squeezed Dean’s hand. “Let’s go get him then.”

Dean pulled up in front of Gabe’s and they got off the bike. Cas walked to the front door with Dean right behind him.

“Alfie? You here?”

Alfie walked out of the kitchen eating an apple. “Yeah. Where else I gonna be?”

Dean grinned and Alfie’s eyes got big.

“Hey, Alfie, I’m Dean.”

Alfie looked at Cas. “This him? Your boyfriend?”

Cas grinned. “Yeah, this is him.”

Alfie grinned. “He is a hunk, Cas, just like you said.”

Cas blushed and Dean laughed.

“Good to meet you. Cas talks about you a lot. Say, I was wondering, would you like to take a ride on my motorcycle?”

Alfie’s eyes got even bigger. “Hell yeah, I would!” 

He looked at Cas and Cas nodded. 

 

Cas stood on the porch and watched as Dean made sure Alfie’s helmet was on tight, then they sat on the bike together and he knew Dean was explaining how to lean into the curves and corners. Then Dean started the bike and they were off down the street.

Cas went back inside and sat down. Gabe was obviously out and the house was strangely quiet. He thought about Dean, and their relationship. He knew Dean thought he was in love with Cas. Cas knew he was in love with Dean, but he wasn’t sure he could trust that. 

He wanted to believe, believe in Dean and believe in himself. He just didn’t know how yet.

He heard the motorcycle pull up and then shut off. He got up and walked to the door, and saw Alfie grinning and hugging Dean. Then he looked up and waved. Cas waved back.

Alfie ran up to Cas, taking excitedly about the ride. Cas grinned and opened the door so they could all go back in. Dean was smiling too.

“That was amazing! I leaned over when we went around corners and it felt like we were gonna fall over but we never did. Dean was so cool…”

Cas laughed. “Take a breath. I know it’s fun.”

Alfie went to the kitchen to get a soda and Dean sat down on the couch. Cas sat next to him.

“Thank you, Dean. It’s obvious he loved the ride.”

Dean smiled. “He’s a great kid, Cas.”

Cas chuckled. “He is, in spite of the two ‘adults’ (he used air quotes) that are his role models.”   
“I think you’re a good role model, Cas. Gabe? I’m not too sure about.”

Cas looked amused. “I know he’s a handful, but he does have his good points.”

Dean laughed. “Yeah? Well, I guess I’ll find out when you have me to dinner.”

Alfie walked out with a sandwich. Cas smiled at him.

“You and your hollow leg. Do you ever get full?”

Alfie flipped him off and went upstairs.

“I had the same problem with my kid brother. Ate me out of everything, every day.”

Cas looked at him with one eyebrow quirked up. 

“You’re going to have to tell me about your family sooner or later.”

Dean nodded. “I know. You ready to go back to my place?”

 

They walked in the door of Dean’s house. Dean said he was going to fix them something to eat, so Cas got the remote and looked for something to watch. He found an entire season of Dr. Sexy.

“What’s Dr. Sexy about?”

Dean walked out of the kitchen with a horrified look on his face.

“You’ve never seen Dr. Sexy?”

When Cas shook his head, Dean smiled. “Oh, it’s on now. I’ve got to school you in the ways of the sexiest doctor on television.”

 

Cas took another bite of his pannini. He’d been very impressed when Dean brought them out, but Dean assured him it was just the joy of having a Foreman grill.

“Does he always wear cowboy boots when he’s working?”

Dean grinned. “Oh yeah he does. It’s one of the things that makes Dr. Sexy so sexy.”

Cas nodded, but added. “Well, only if you find cowboy boots sexy.”   
Dean looked at him as if he had said something bad about being gay.

“You  _ don’t _ ?”

Cas shrugged. “Not particularly.”

Dean shook his head. “I can’t believe I ever got involved with such a heathen.”

Cas laughed. “Change my mind then.”

Dean’s eyes sparkled. “Challenge accepted.”

Cas did say that the doctor was very good-looking. 

“He’s got a nice ass.”

Dean wiggled his eyebrows. “Not as nice as yours, angel.”

Cas laughed, “I really can’t take credit for it, it just sort of grew there.”

Dean threw back his head and laughed.

This led to kissing which led to making out. Cas was on his back, on the couch, with Dean on top of him.

They both had their shirts off, and Dean was mouthing Cas’ nipple. 

“You should get your nipples pierced, angel”

Cas lifted his head. “Yeah? You think so?”

Dean kissed him. “I really do. Your nipples are so sensitive, imagine having rings in them, or barbells. Alway erect, rubbing against your shirt… not to mention then I could pull on them with my teeth.”

Cas got goosebumps just thinking about it.

“Okay! You sold me. How much will it cost?”

Dean grinned. “My treat, angel. I would really get off on that.”

They decided to get that done next Saturday.

 


	16. Chapter 16

Cas sat up. “Tell me about your family, Dean, about your childhood.”

Dean sat back with a sigh. “Yeah, okay. It’s only fair.”

Cas put a hand on Dean’s thigh and waited.

“My mom died when I was four. There was a fire in the middle of the night. Sam was just a baby. My dad handed him to me and told me to get out of the house. I ran with him and waited in the yard. Dad came out, but Mom didn’t.”

Cas squeezed Dean’s thigh. “I’m so sorry.”

Dean looked at him with a smile. “It’s okay, it was a long time ago. Anyway, Dad may have escaped the fire but it might as well have killed him too. The fact that he couldn’t save her broke him. He started drinking, moving us from town to town. He took odd jobs but they always ended and then we’d be on the road again. He’d take off for days, leave us in a seedy motel. I raised my brother because he couldn’t.”

Dean took a deep breath. 

“I did a lot of things I’m not proud of just to get money for food.” Dean glanced at Cas then looked down at his hands. “You’re not the only one with a checkered past.”

Cas said quietly, “That’s just it, it’s in the past. You taught me that our past doesn’t define who we are now.”

Dean nodded. “Yeah, thanks, Cas. Anyway, Dad drank himself to death about ten years later. Sam and I went to live with one of his friends, Bobby. Bobby was awesome. Now, Sam is in college to be a lawyer and I’m here.”

Cas leaned over and kissed Dean’s temple. “I’m glad you’re here.”

Dean smiled. “I am too, angel.”

Cas kissed him and that led to them making out again. This time Cas was on top. He rutted down against Dean and they both moaned.

Dean looked a little worried. Cas pulled back and asked him if anything was wrong.

Dean looked away then back at Cas. “Cas, would you… uh… I want you to make love to me.”

Cas was shocked. “Dean, you mean…”

Dean looked intently into Cas’ eyes. “I want you inside me. I mean, unless you don’t want to.”

Cas smiled. “Let’s move this to the bed.”

They already had their shirts off and it didn’t take any time at all for them to get naked. Cas lay next to Dean.

“I didn’t know you were a switch.”

Dean’s ears got red. “I haven’t bottomed in years.”

“Then why now? Why me?”

Dean smiled. “First of all, I love you, and second, have you  _ seen _ yourself? You’re gorgeous and sexy and you’re so good in bed and… well, I just want you inside me.”

Cas smiled. “Well, we’re even then, because I haven’t topped in years.” 

He moved to straddle Dean’s hips. Leaning over, he claimed Dean’s mouth. Then he moved his mouth along Dean’s jaw and down his throat.

He sucked a mark on Dean’s collar bone, and then moved to nibble and suck at a nipple. Dean was making the sweetest sounds. They gave Cas the courage to move lower.

He kissed and tongued his way down Dean’s chest and belly. He bypassed Dean’s very hard cock and sucked a mark onto Dean’s groin. Dean groaned.

Then he grabbed Dean’s cock. Dean gasped. He ran his tongue inside the foreskin, licking at the head. Dean fisted the sheet and mumbled Cas’ name. Cas used his hand to pull the foreskin back and lick the drop of precum that was glistening at the head.

Cas took Dean’s cock in his mouth, relishing the weight of it, the taste. He sucked all the way down, counted in his head to ten and then pulled back up. He flattened his tongue against the underside as he did. Then he let it drop from his mouth, sat back and asked for the lube.

Dean’s eyes were dark, and his hand shook as he handed Cas the bottle. Cas leaned over and pressed a kiss to Dean’s belly and opened it. He let some pour into his hand.

“Lift your legs.” Dean did, grabbing them with his hands.

Cas looked at the tight pink hole and smiled. He ran one lubed finger into it and listened to Dean gasp and then moan.

“Fuck, you’re tight! Gonna have to take my time. I don’t want to hurt you.”

Dean lifted his head and looked at Cas. “Cas, please… hurry… I need you so bad.”

Cas ran his finger in and out waiting for Dean to relax. When he did, Cas added another finger. Dean was so tight it was like he had his fingers in a vice.

He pumped then in and out, then found Dean’s prostate and rubbed it. Dean yelled. He did it again, then added a third finger and began to scissor them. 

He finally couldn’t wait another minute. His cock was throbbing, just on the other side of pain, and Dean was begging him. He slowly pulled his fingers out and grabbed his cock, lubing it. He lined up and pressed against Dean’s hole.

It resisted, so Cas pressed harder and then he was in. Dean groaned and he pushed in further. He knew he needed to take his time, so he held a moment, then pulled back a little and pushed in more. Gradually, he made it all the way inside, his balls laying against Dean’s ass.

“Fuck! It feels so-so good, Cas. I need you to move…”

Cas pulled back a little and pressed back. He pulled back a little further and pushed back in. Then he pulled back until just the head was in Dean and he slid back in.

Being inside Dean was mind-blowing. It was tight, really tight, and warm. Dean’s channel clenched at Cas’ cock.

Dean was making those sweet sounds again, but he moaned out that he needed Cas to go faster, harder. Cas increased his speed and began to slam into Dean as hard as he could. Dean grabbed his cock and began to thrust up into his hand.

Cas felt it coming and he needed Dean to come first. He sat back and wrapped his hand around Dean’s. Dean moaned and thrust up into their cupped hands and came. Cas watched Dean’s cock spurt out strings of cum, and felt Dean’s hole spasm around him.

He came so hard, spots swam in front of his eyes.

It felt like it lasted for minutes. When it was over, Cas fell forward onto Dean and Dean wrapped his arms around him as they tried to get their breath back.

 


	17. Chapter 17

Cas rolled off Dean and cuddled into his side.

Dean lifted his head and kissed Cas on the forehead. “That was  _ so good _ , Cas. You blew my mind.”

Cas kissed Dean’s shoulder. “I agree. We’re definitely going to do that again.”

Just as Dean said, “hell yeah we are,” his stomach growled loudly. Cas laughed.

“I need sustenance. How about spaghetti?”

Cas nodded. “Sounds good.”

Cas helped with the prep and soon they were eating. Cas moaned over the garlic bread, and Dean grinned at him.

“You better stop that, or I’ll bend you over this table.”

“Promises, promises. Don’t flirt.”

Dean got up. “Clear the table.”

Cas’ eyes got big. “Where are you going?”

Dean winked. “To get the lube. Challenge accepted.”

Cas picked up the dishes and scraped them. He was running them under water when Dean came up behind him and wrapped his arms around Cas’ waist.

“Leave them, angel.” He turned Cas around and into a passionate kiss. He kissed Cas while he guided him to the table.

Dean pulled Cas’ sweats down and off him. Then he took off his own sweats and kissed Cas hard. He ran his hands down Cas’ belly and grabbed his cock, which was already half hard just from the idea of being bent over the table. 

Dean kissed him and played with Cas’ cock until it was hard. Cas could feel Dean’s erect cock against his thigh.

Dean put his mouth next to Cas’ ear and whispered, “Turn around angel and bend over.”

Cas felt a thrill. He turned and laid his upper body on the table, his ass sticking out.

Dean growled and grabbed Cas’ ass in both hands. He spread Cas’ ass cheeks apart.

“God you look so beautiful like this.”

He opened the lube and poured some in his hand. . Then he pushed two fingers into Cas and Cas gasped. He scissored them, opening Cas. He pulled them out and Cas felt Dean’s cock pressing against his hole.

Dean slid in and didn’t stop until he was inside Cas as far as he could get. Cas groaned. Dean held there for a moment and then pulled all the way out, sliding back in again.

“You are so amazing, angel. You just take my cock so well. I need to take a video so you can see just how good you take it.”

Cas held on to the table and pushed back against Dean. Dean began to fuck Cas hard and Cas was saying, “Oh, oh, oh..” with every thrust. Dean leaned over him and kissed his back. Cas’ dick was hitting his belly with every thrust. He wanted to grab it but he couldn’t. 

Dean fucked Cas hard and Cas threw one hand back to grab Dean by the hip. He felt his balls tighten and he tried to tell Dean he was going to cum, but he was coming before he could say anything. He yelled out Dean’s name as his cum splattered on the floor.

Dean groaned and thrust in as hard as he could and just held there. Then Cas could feel Dean’s warm cum filling him.

Dean yelled, “Fuck!” and fell over Cas’ back. He left his cock inside until it got too soft to thrust anymore. Then he pulled out and stood up, pulling Cas to his feet. He turned him and embraced him.

“I love you, Cas. I love you so much.”

Cas wrapped his arms around Dean. “I love you too.”

After the mess was cleaned up, they curled up together on the couch. Classic rock played softly and they just talked. 

The subject of Alfie came up.

“He doesn’t want to go to college and I want him to. He’s so smart, he could be anything he sets his mind to. But he won’t even discuss it with me.”

Dean sat for a minute, thinking. “Maybe I can talk to him about it.”

Cas perked up. “Really? He really likes you. It would be great if you did.”

Dean smiled. “Of course, I’ll talk to him. Maybe when I come to dinner.”

Cas kissed Dean’s cheek. “We’re still on for Wednesday and thank you.”

“Anything for you, angel. And I like the kid a lot.”

 

Wednesday arrived. Cas got off work early to make the meal and make sure everyone was staying home. He needed everything to go off without a hitch. 

He put the lasagna in the oven and began to make a salad. 

Gabe walked in and stood for a minute watching him.

“This is important to you, isn’t it?”

Cas turned and frowned at him. 

“It’s very important to me and please, try to be nice. Don’t embarrass me.”

Gabe smirked. “I’ll try, Cassie. Can’t guarantee anything, you realize, but I’ll try. Did you talk to Alfie about being on his best behavior?”

Cas shook his head. “No, I don’t worry about him. He won’t make a pass at my boyfriend, show up for dinner in his underwear or ask about how I am in bed over the salad.”

Gabe laughed and walked out of the room, leaving a very nervous Cas standing in the kitchen. He went back to the salad.

When Dean knocked, Cas had bitten every fingernail down to the quick. He opened the door, and Dean took one look at him and pulled him into a tight hug.

“Holy crap, babe! Why so stressed out? It’s only dinner.”   
Cas leaned into him.

“I just want everything to go well, and I’m worried about Gabe.”

Dean pulled away with a laugh.

“I know Gabe. There’s nothing he could pull that would shock me.”

Cas shook his head. “You clearly don’t know him as well as you think you do.”

Dean sat on the couch while Cas went to get the lasagna out of the oven and put in the garlic bread. Gabe walked in the room.

“Hey there, Dean! I’ve been meaning to pay you back for putting up my bail. Here.” He handed Dean a check.

“Thanks, Gabe. How did that all turn out?”

Gabe laughed. “I got it dismissed. Balth had to do some community service.”

Dean thanked him and Cas called them to dinner. They walked to the table and sat down. In a minute, Alfie joined them.

Gabe was surprisingly well-behaved. They chatted about work, and Dean asked Alfie about school. Cas visibly relaxed as dinner progressed.

When dinner was over, and Dean had complimented Cas repeatedly, Gabe excused himself and Dean, Cas and Alfie went to the living room.

“So, Alfie, what are your plans after graduation?”

Alfie shook his head. “Haven’t decided. I want to get a job. I’m thinking of sales or something.”

Dean looked at Cas and then at Alfie. “Not going to college?”

“Nah, man. I’ve had enough of school.”

Dean smiled. “I can understand that. But let me ask you, have you considered junior college? I went. You can choose your classes, still hold down a job… it might help you decide what you want to do with your life.”

Alfie looked at him. “You went to junior college?”

Dean nodded. “Sure did. I took mechanics and it really helped me get a good job when I graduated.”

Alfie looked thoughtful. “I never thought about that. I might look into that. Thanks man.”

Dean grinned. “Any time. If you have any questions I can answer, just ask.”

Alfie nodded. He stood up.

“Going to my room. Nice to see you again, Dean.”

When he was gone, Cas hugged Dean.

“Jesus, Dean! Thank you so much for that!”

Dean kissed Cas. “No problem, angel, I’m just glad he listened.”

  
  



	18. Chapter 18

After that night, Dean began sleeping over at Cas’ once a week, and Cas spent every weekend at Dean’s. Dean  had quickly learned to pretty much ignore Gabe, especially when he was coming on to Dean or when he wanted details about his and Cas’ love life.

Alfie was filling out forms for the local junior college. Cas was thrilled and Dean was pretty pleased with himself.

Things were going smoothly.  That is, until Cas showed up at Dean’s door late at night on a Tuesday. Dean was already in bed when he heard pounding on his front door. He got up and pulled on some sweats, grumbling to himself as he made his way to the door.

When he opened to find a very upset Cas, he pulled Cas inside and hugged him.

“What’s wrong angel?”

Cas took a few deep breaths, trying to get back some composure.

“It’s Gabe…”

Dean led Cas to the couch and they sat down.

“Okay, what’s the little troll done this time?”

Cas looked at Dean and took another deep breath.

“He proposed to Kali.”

Dean couldn’t believe his ears. “He did what now?”

“Proposed to Kali! And she accepted! He says Alfie and I have to move out.”

Dean took a deep breath of his own.

“Okay. It’s going to be fine. I was waiting to bring this up, but…”

“What?” Cas was still clearly upset.

“Angel, I want us to move in together. I’ve been thinking about it for a while now. And Alfie can move in too.”

Cas looked at Dean for so long, Dean got nervous.

“Angel? Don’t you want to live with me?”

Cas’ face broke into a huge smile.

“I do! I really do. I just… well, I thought you didn’t want to.”

“What? Why would you think that?”

Cas looked down. “You never even brought it up. I was waiting for you to say something, but you never did.”

Dean sighed. “I wasn’t sure  _ you _ wanted it. I know how scary change can be for you, and you seemed like you were settled in with Gabe. I was afraid I’d scare you.”

Cas laughed. “You are a real goof sometimes, you know that? Like anything you’d suggest could scare me away.”

Dean looked so happy it made Cas’ stomach lurch a little. 

“I was being a goof, I admit. So, it’s settled? You and Alfie’ll move in here?”

 

They were moved in a month later. 

Alfie only had a month before graduation, and he had been accepted into the sociology curriculum at the local junior college. It was just something that Alfie found interesting. He would live with them while he attended classes, and he was looking for a part time job.

Gabe married Kali in Vegas.

Dean and Cas fit together perfectly. They worked virtually the same hours and had the weekends off together. Alfie was gone a lot after he graduated, so they pretty much had the apartment to themselves.

Eight months later, Dean proposed. 

They were married in a civil ceremony. Gabe paid for a nice reception. Marriage to Kali had really calmed him down.

They danced the first dance to  _ Your Song _ by Elton John. 

 

Alfie graduated a year and a half later (and went on to a four-year college with an eye on being a teacher). Dean and Cas sat in the crowd and Cas cried a little.

 

Four years later they adopted a little boy named Jack.

 

Cas got the quote, “An unexamined life is not worth living’ on his ribs on their tenth anniversary. 

“It just fits,” he told Dean.

 


End file.
